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Apr. 17th, 2007 | 10:08 am

wow its been forever ahh i should try to update this bullsht every once and a while! ahh listening to musicn trying to get over what has been going on in my boring ass life!!! ahhlove love love boys boyus boys!! i love them! especially one mwah besitos baby!....ahh he dont read this crap....just wanted to day hi! ppl 


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In the library

May. 19th, 2005 | 05:02 pm

whats up ppl im supposed to be in here studyign but f*ck that neways how have yall been. My life right now is going so good i have a BOYFRIEND yea my first awesome right his name is LUIS ANTONIO no he is not a moji hehe hes so kewl hes in a rocking killer satanic rock band ROCK ON BABY ROCK ON hehe gotta jet don't know what to say

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(no subject)

Oct. 23rd, 2004 | 06:19 pm

J uStJeSsI097: omg i was gatcho crying yesterday
J uStJeSsI097: :'(
alienfroglover14: why
J uStJeSsI097: i guess my parents didn't know but i was in the next room and then i hear i cna't put up with this
J uStJeSsI097: i was all wtf
J uStJeSsI097: then my mom was asking my dad where he was and why the fuck these chicks are always calling at the house
J uStJeSsI097: and she was all ur a big flirt and all this shit i was all like what
J uStJeSsI097: and im all he is like that
J uStJeSsI097: what if they split up then i was happy i was all fuck my dad hes never here neways so who cares if they split up
J uStJeSsI097: i just think about my mom i wonder if she cries at nightalienfroglover14: she prob does
J uStJeSsI097: man that just sux cuz she's real strong and never would she cry in front of me

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Oct. 23rd, 2004 | 05:37 pm
mood: depressed depressed
music: Los Lonely Boys


[name and what does your name mean] Jessica and it means "GODS GRACE"
[hair color]- dark brown
[eye color]- dark brown
[marital status]- I’m not married
[education]- high school
[shoe size]- 8 1/2
[skin color]- im not that sure im not black or güera im in between
[school]- Weslaco East High School
[hometown]- Weslaco


Smiled?: today
Laughed?: today
Cried?: yesterdy
Bought something?: today
Danced? today
Were sarcastic?:pues everyday
Kissed someone?: like in april
Talked to an ex?:never
Watched your favorite movie:last week
Had a nightmare?: 2 daze ago


Last book you read: "If You Come Softly"
Last movie you saw: Finding Nemo w'lil sis
Last song you heard: Lady in the Blue Dress-Senses Fail
Last time you showered: in da morning
Last thing you ate: some fajitas

~*DO YOU...*~

Smoke?: a veces
Do drugs?: a veces
Have sex?: never
Sleep with stuff animals?: nope
Live in the moment?: yea sometimes but then i loose track of time and don't value that ppl i am with
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?:no
Have a dream that keeps coming back? yea
Play an instrument?: no
Believe there is life on other planets?: i would hope so
Remember your first love?: yep
Still love him/her?: yea
Read the newspaper?:sometimes
Have any gay or lesbian friends?: yea
Believe in miracles?: yes
Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: yes i do
Consider yourself tolerant of others?: yeah kinda
Consider love a mistake?: hell no, bacause u learn from ur mistakes u can't learn to love i believe it jsut happens
Like the taste of alcohol?: yep
Have a favorite candy?: sure,i lovecady corn and caramel candy
Believe in magic?:no
Believe in God?: yep
Pray?: yep
Go to church?:yes
Have any secrets?:i don't think so
Have any pets: a dog, 2 birds,like 10 fishies, and a lil sis (psike)
Do well in school?: yeah but not that much right now im doing better thanks to Joshua
Go to or plan to go to college?: yeah
Have a major?: I wanna major in Either Business or Law or both
Talk to strangers who instant message you?:sure
Wear hats?: sometimes
Have any piercings?: yea just my ears but like all gurls do
Have any tattoos?:no
Hate yourself?: sometimes
Have an obsession?: i dunno
Have a secret crush?:nope
Do they know yet? no
Collect anything?: nope
Have a best friend?: yea
Wish on stars?: yeah
Like your handwriting?: man hell no
Have any bad habits?: sure everyone does
Care about looks? yea sometimes but im ugly so whatever
Boy/girlfriend's looks?: no


Current Dress: purple shirt my lil skirt its totally sute and my converse
Current Mood: i feel fat my mom just told me i was fat so yea
Current Music: SENSES FAIL
Current Taste: Iced Tea
Current Hair: its up with a purple ribbon in it and also my bangs are straight down i look so evil
Current Annoyance: my mom
Current CD in Stereo: Los Lonely Boys
Current Favorite Celebrity: SOME GUY NAMED SEAN I THINK FROM life as we know it

~* LOVE *~

longest relationship: never had one
shortest relationship: '' '' ''
been in love w/ more than 1 person? yeah
meanest thing a guy/girl has done to you?: Kissing me was a totally mistake and wished he could take it back because he felt nothing for me
ever broke someone's heart? don't think so
someone break your heart? yeah


You Talked to: My cuzin Juanita
You Hugged:my cuzin Brandon i love u papasito
Instant messaged: Alonzo or Jc
You Yelled At: no one
You Had A Crush On: Phillip
Who Broke Your Heart: Mario

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(no subject)

Oct. 16th, 2004 | 10:04 pm
mood: optimistic optimistic
music: Senses fail- ur cute when u scream

I went to mexico today omg was it funny!!!

Right when i got home i remembered about PiGSKIN crap i really wanted to go.

I wonder how they did!!

Neways about prog. These guys were gatcho drunk me and my mom were just laughing hardcore they could barely walk and they were talking freakin loud.

I can't believe i called my man Joshua, Mario ahh i hate that!!!


goTTA GO talk later ok love ya -Jess-

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!!!! I'M FATTT !!!!!

Oct. 10th, 2004 | 05:10 pm
mood: loved loved
music: Just like a prayer-Madonna

It's sorta Official my mom thinks im a fat ass

Once i'm fine and able to look at a mirror and tell myself im not that fat or ugly!! She goes on and yells at me telling me im fat WHAT THE FUCK!!!!


Ahh i hate this i'll rather be skinny but whatever what can i do right i excersize i try ok when softball starts ill loose weight.!!


Neways i had the bestest dream it was so awesome:...........



Omg it eas awesome it all started out with me at a party all my friends were there and it was so much fun. While i walked in my house through the backdoor to get something i feel some one come up to me and hug me really tight he leaned over and whispered in my ear....

"I love You Jessica, be mine." ..... I was all awww then he picks me up and puts me on the counter and i looked into his eyes and comb his hair with my fingers and say i love you too..!!


When i woke up i was like that would be so awesome if he really felt that way about me i would be soo much happier.

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Suicide Think About it

Oct. 10th, 2004 | 05:04 pm
mood: im fat im fat

What about electricuting yourself in your bathtub? Ask the 25-year-old who tried to electricute himself. He lived. But both his arms are gone.

What about jumping? Ask John. He used to be intelligent, with an engaging sense of humor. That was before he leapt from a building. Now, he's brain-damaged and will always need care. He staggers and has seizures. He lives in a fog. But, worst of all, he KNOWS he used to be normal.

What about pills? Ask the 12-year-old with extensive liver damage from an overdose. Have you ever seen anyone die of liver damage? You turn yellow. It's a hard way to go.

What about a gun? Ask the 24-year-old who shot himself in the head. Now he drags one leg, has a useless arm and has no vision or hearing on one side. He lived through his "foolproof" suicide. You might too.

But... Who will clean your blood off the carpet or scrape your brains from the ceiling? Commercial cleaning companies may refuse that job--but SOMEONE has to do it.

Who will have to cut you down from where you hung yourself or identify your bloated body after you've drowned? Your father? Your mother? Your wife? Your son? Your best friend?

The carefully worded "loving" suicide note is of no help. Those who loved you will NEVER completely recover. They'll feel regret and an unending pain.

Suicide is contagious. Look around your family. Look closely at the 4 year old playing with his cars on the rug. Kill yourself tonight, and he may do it ten years from now.

You DO have other choices. There are people who can help you through this crisis. Call a hotline. Call a friend. Call your minister or priest. Call a doctor or hospital. Call the police. They will tell you that there's hope. Maybe you'll find it in the mail tomorrow. Or in a phone call this weekend. But what you're seeking could be just a minute, a month, or a day away.

You say you don't want to be stopped? Still want to do it? -Well, then, I may see you in the psychiatric ward later. And we'll work with whatever you have left.

Remember: Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.


^^i found this. It makes sense. I dont want to hurt you guys...I really dont. Please dont hurt me either...I wouldnt be able to live with myself if something happened. Seriously. I dont deal with guilt very well..and that's all I would feel...FOREVER.^^

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Did YoU tHiNk ThAt I w@s GonN@ gIVe iT uP tO yOU..

Oct. 4th, 2004 | 06:56 pm
mood: drained drained
music: Trapt my fav band

(Not really he's an ass but hes fucking hottt) ~wink wink~ Shandy u know what i mean he he

woOw no one really knows exactly how another person is feeling. I never knew such feeling of hatred towards eachother and ourselves could slowly destroy our self-esteem. This realy sucks but i have tried to turn a new leaf i was to be happy and not be focusing on all the wrong dumb materialist things i gotta focus on school and keeping my grades up i can not fail again i'll just have to try harder. I was so happy to hear that J.C. is well he buddie. I really want to go to FLORIDA I want to see how my cuzins are doing.

mAn the other day i realized my mom was taking ZOLOFT u know what that is right i almost started crying i was crying wow but i was mistaken my mom had to take them because of some chemical inbalance and for her muscle stiffnes she jsut wasn't feeling herself and im kinda ok about it cuz they are very small dosages. I feel sorry for some of the stupid things i do but i hurt ppl and i have to deal with it. I do im only human

Hey ppl just wanna say hi and assure u that i do care about u each and everyone of yall i pray for you every day sometimes twice a day. THanks for being there for me one time or another. With gratitude *Jess*


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Sep. 26th, 2004 | 08:03 pm

The nerve what the hell I went to a 15era on Friday and Cosme asks me to dance with me i was like Hell no then he was trying to talk to me im such a bitch i said i would dance with him i gave in but then he neer came back to my table so Fock him ahh And then their this other asshole his name is Julio Cantu ahhh i hate boiz sometimes specially assholes like them. Ne ways nothing new here just being a bitch to ppl like always tiff cut he pelo and she says it extra lil aww it must look cute i wanna cut mine but my mother never took me whatever. I saw Mr. Hinojosa a church i didn't get to talk with him i was with my mom i remember when me and Mirna had a notebook last year she put as a joke that he was cute and well i thought she was sayin for real and I put that i thought he was cute too when she wrote bakc she was all u sicko. Man that was funny but i do think he's kinda cute whatever. im out and don't lie to me ppl i know im a bitch

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Survey take plz!! :)

Sep. 26th, 2004 | 04:13 pm
mood: pissed off pissed off

1. If I was going to change completely in every possible way but only one thing could stay the same, what would you pick it to be?

2. Conversely, if everything was to stay the same, but one thing must change, what would you pick it to be?

What would you do if...

3. ... I was in a horrible accident and I was in critical condition at the hospital?

4. ... I committed suicide?

5. ... I could no longer speak to you?

6. ... I won the lottery?

7. a)...I ran away from home?

b)what if i ran away to your house?

8. ... I wanted to skip school with you?

9. ... I decided I seriously wanted to dropout of high school?

10. ... I followed you to college? (lets say i stayed in school)

11. Do you think I could/would beat someone up?

12. Do you think i could/would beat you up?

13. Where do you see me in ten years?

14. Do I resemble an animal of any kind? if so , what kind?

15. How would you prefer to kill yourself / what would you suggest?

16. How old do you think I'll live to be(lets say no accidents happen)?

17. Where do you see me going to college?

18. Do you like me? at all? in any way?

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